C-of-C-C BULLETIN: PSYCHOGEOGRAPHY AND THE REALPOLITIK OF CHEESE

A Soft-Crust Missive in the Coming Judicial-Executive Cage Match

Once again, our grand theory holds: cheese—humble, melted, and ever-symbolic—has breached the citadel of power. It now figures in the constitutional grudge match between the branches of government. The medium? Pizza.

According to reports, members of the judiciary have begun receiving unsolicited, anonymous deliveries of piping hot pizza pies. These are not rigged boxes or ominous threats. These are, presumably, edible gifts of mozzarella diplomacy—simple offerings from a citizenry grown weary of abstraction.

But instead of taking the stunt in the spirit of classic street theatre or interpretive dissent, the judicial response has been curiously sour. Some judges have interpreted the pizzas as acts of aggression. One might say they’ve taken the mozzarella personally.

But let us pause: What is pizza, if not cheese in full civic regalia? What is a prank, if not a cry against misrule?

The box has the name of the local pizza joint right on it. We presume the judges know their neighborhood. They could make a few calls. Ask about toppings. Maybe even enjoy a slice. Instead, they escalate.

Here, the Council reminds its readers of the once-common protest ritual: the shaving cream pie to the face of the pompous. A gesture both humiliating and affectionate—political yet absurd. It was never meant to maim, but to puncture the inflated.

[Footnote 1: The pie-to-face gag reached its zenith in the 1970s, when anti-authoritarian clowns took aim at CEOs, MPs, and even Ann Coulter. More performance than violence, more dessert than dagger.]

But now, the psychogeography of the pizza turns more conspiratorial. The delivery of free pies has a lingering, inescapable aftersmell: Pizzagate. Yes, that half-buried (but never dead) theory tying together pizzerias, cheese, politics, and subterranean sins. One cannot quite separate the scent of pizza from the stink of secrets.

Whether or not Pizzagate is fabrication, exaggeration, or encrypted allegory is beyond the jurisdiction of this bulletin. What is true is this: until the full Epstein files are released, pizza will not simply be food.

It will be implication.

So let us not dismiss this pie-as-political gesture. It may be, in fact, a warning from the undercommons—the raw-dough fellah class, rising up not with torches but with tomato sauce.

One might call it an edible metaphor.

One might call it mozzarella mutiny.

One might just be hungry.

—Filed by Reynard Pierre-DeWitt, Chaos Coordinator and Street Cheese Theorist

Source code: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/ar-AA1EyjSZ