—On Naming, NAFTA, and the Nation for Sale—
Filed by the Council-of-Concerned-Conservationists | Dept. of Structural Irony & Transactional Destiny
This week, the Cuauhtémoc, a Mexican tall ship named for the last Aztec emperor—“he who descends like an eagle”—struck the Brooklyn Bridge.
No major damage reported. Except to the American myth.
Because what descended wasn’t just a ship. It was a symbol. An eagle from the South. A nation we outsourced our factories to. A culture we borrowed from, blamed, and bought back in discount form.
And what did it strike? The Brooklyn Bridge—that iconic American structure which, if you’re gullible enough, someone’s always ready to sell you.
Because the Brooklyn Bridge is always for sale.
Just like America.
We used to build bridges. Now we finance them. Lease them. Monetize the tolls.
And the ship we sold our soul to came back to remind us.
America isn’t a country. It’s a proposition.
And propositions, as any streetwalker knows, are for sale.
NAFTA wasn’t just a trade agreement. It was a transcontinental pickup line:
“Wanna get in business together, baby? We’ll manufacture the dream.”
The Cuauhtémoc wasn’t off course. It hit exactly what it was supposed to:
A metaphor.
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ALTDEF: “Descending Eagle”
(n.) The inevitable return of what you sold off, dressed as destiny, crashing into your infrastructure.
As Council member Reynard Pierre-DeWitt put it:
“It wasn’t a collision. It was a closing of accounts.”
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This marks the second symbolic maritime strike in as many seasons—first, the container ship Dali ruptured the Chesapeake’s span like a brushstroke across a fragile canvas; now, the Cuauhtémoc, the Descending Eagle, brushes the Brooklyn Bridge as if misreading a prophecy. Both vessels, laden with allegory, charted courses not merely through water, but through the metaphysical infrastructure of a nation unraveling—bridges to nowhere, connecting ports in the Empire of Nothing. The Council files this as further confirmation that naming is destiny, and destiny is drifting.
Filed under:
Free Trade Fables and Borderline Mythology
Infrastructure as Metaphor, Metaphor as Infrastructure
The Eagle Has Landed (Poorly)
Tariffed Romance in the Age of Terminal Velocity
The Bridge is Always for Sale, Darling—Ask About Our Loyalty Program
Source code:
COUNCIL-OF CONCERNED-CONSERVATIONISTS…..Between Jest And Earnest….. 
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