INTRODUCING COUNCIL GADFLY NOOR SINGHA GRUDJ

—And The Modern Liberty Pole—

The Council originally retained Noor Singha Grudj for comic relief. We have since come to regard her as a documentary source.

There was a time when Noor’s essays seemed delightfully implausible. Experience, however, has steadily promoted many of her more imaginative proposals into respectable opinion. We therefore continue publishing her dispatches—not because we agree with them, but because they have proven remarkably reliable indicators of what everyone else will be thinking next year.

Ms. Grudj is not a member of the Council. She serves instead as our resident gadfly and Correspondent for Emerging Orthodoxy (CEO).

Noor’s own family history is an admirable illustration of the modern world. Her parents were South Asians who settled in Britain during the closing years of the Empire. Noor herself was born in the United States, thereby acquiring American citizenship by birth while inheriting a distinctly British confidence in orderly administration. She has never regarded these several inheritances as contradictory. Indeed, she considers them cumulative improvements.

To commemorate America’s two hundred and fiftieth birthday, Noor has graciously volunteered to restore one of the oldest traditions of the American Revolution.

The Council has, with customary hesitation, agreed to publish her remarks.

On The Responsible Erection of Liberty

My dear Council,

As we celebrate two hundred and fifty years of American liberty, I have noticed that many citizens know remarkably little about one of the Revolution’s most important patriotic symbols: the Liberty Pole.

EDITOR’S NOTE: The following illustration, reprinted courtesy of our brother publication, The **Perennial Sophomore**, was inserted into Ms. Grudj’s manuscript without her knowledge or approval. Their editors remain convinced that political idealism and showing off for one’s sweetheart have seldom been mutually exclusive.

Before the Revolution, liberty poles began appearing throughout the American colonies. They were simply tall wooden poles erected in public squares, often decorated with ribbons, flags, evergreen garlands, or the word LIBERTY. They became gathering places for speeches, celebrations, and expressions of resistance to arbitrary government.

The British disliked them immensely.

Whenever Royal officials or British troops encountered one, it was liable to be chopped down. The colonists, displaying admirable persistence, simply raised another. Thus began a recurring contest between those determined to remove liberty poles and those determined to erect them.

History records this as one of the many charming customs leading to American independence.

I have therefore decided that this venerable tradition deserves to be revived.

Naturally, one should not merely imitate the past. One should improve it.

Accordingly, I have dedicated a new Liberty Pole suitable for the twenty-first century.

Image reprinted by permission from our brother publication, The **Perennial Sophomore**, devoted to the proposition that America’s oldest political tradition is not voting, but irreverent young people cheerfully poking fun at the authorities—usually with a prank, a liberty pole, or both.

Rather than placing a simple liberty cap atop the pole, I have installed an elegant bouquet of Flock public-safety cameras beneath tasteful patriotic bunting. The effect is both festive and reassuring.

Some traditionalists have questioned whether surveillance equipment belongs upon a Liberty Pole.

I cannot imagine why.

Our patriotic ancestors wished to preserve freedom by resisting unnecessary intrusion.

Today we preserve freedom by ensuring that unnecessary behavior is promptly observed. Surely this represents progress.

Indeed, I have often reflected that our British cousins deserve more credit than they receive. Having once misunderstood liberty sufficiently to chop down liberty poles, they have since become pioneers in the civilized art of public observation. One might even say they have completed the journey that America is only now beginning. It is comforting to think that the old disagreements have finally been resolved.

“Some have wondered how the people who gave us Magna Carta and Parliament also gave us one of the world’s most sophisticated cultures of public observation. I prefer to think of it as constitutional government naturally maturing into constitutional supervision.”
—Noor Singha Grudj

I could not fail to notice that several members of the Council seemed oddly uncomfortable as the cameras on the Liberty Pole were switched on. This struck me as rather curious. Surely no patriotic American objects to being observed while exercising his freedom. After all, if one is behaving properly, surveillance is simply another form of applause.

With that comforting thought, I dedicated the new Liberty Pole to the next two hundred and fifty years of American freedom.

The cameras, I am pleased to report, immediately recorded unanimous approval.

Happy two hundred and fiftieth birthday, America.

Please smile for the camera.