In the interest of economy, the Council has combined two of its departments for this presentation: Detritus: Mal’Poetica, our poetry and lyric column, and Nomen Est Omen, our investigation into nominative determinism. The occasion is Facebook’s adoption of the name Meta, which struck us as a name unusually well suited to its enterprise. Black Cloud has obligingly supplied the music—or at least the words. The editors will explain the rest.
“ By combining two Council features we don’t have to compensate Rafe Van Hoy, the writer of What’s Forever For, a song made famous by Michael Martin Murphy—because parody. At least that’s what the editors are telling the accounting department.
Tonight, Black Cloud offers a lament in the persona of melancholic country music crooner—Mark Zuckerberg.
He’s just a guy who needs Likes—trust me—and also a man who might like to be Caesar. His fascination with the classical world is well documented, not least through his sister, a scholar of Greece and Rome. Perhaps his fantasy is to be laurel-crowned. After all, most of the originals were very wealthy men.
When Facebook announced its corporate name change to Meta, the first word that came to mind was metaphysic.
Then we remembered that physic is also an archaic word for a laxative. At least that’s what they called it in the days of the enema, when we were children.
Follow our etymology here :
Isn’t a physic an apt description of what Facebook is for so many people? A metaphor for the reverse-flowing enema of bile from wrathful commenters, most of whom, in our corner of the Metaverse, seem to be snide establishment supporters and their shadows—an assortment of other leftists and their Conservative fellow travelers.
Actually—and don’t punch me in the face—Meta, the company’s new name, refers to the metaverse, which we also happen to explore here at the C-of-C-C Newsletter in our reviews of book reviews.
We laughed when we looked up the definition of meta and discovered that a review of book reviews was among the examples!
Perhaps our memory isn’t so bad, and we had unconsciously retained the definition from some previous investigation. Or perhaps it was simply a fortunate coincidence.
We laughed again.
Anyway, Black Cloud has adapted this lovely song, which he admits can almost make even him cry. So let’s try to have a little sympathy for Mark. Maybe that blank look is actually melancholy.”
—The Editors
A lament by Black Cloud, after Rafe Van Hoy
🎶 I’ve been lookin’ up people
And how they flee the sublime
And lately all I’ve been seein’
Are people
Throwin’ time away and losing their minds
🎶 Maybe it’s me who’s gone crazy
But I can’t understand why
All these posers keep hurtin’ each other
Still, their LIKES are all we want to define
🎶 So what’s the glory in posting?
Doesn’t anybody ever play together anymore?
And if LIKE never lasts forever
Tell me what’s a Meta for?
🎶 I’ve been listenin’ to people
And they say LIKES are the key
And it’s not my way
To let them
Lead you astray
It’s just an algorithm to me
🎶 I see Like-hungry people
Tryin’ their best to survive
While in their hands is a dying bromance
And they’re not even tryin’ to keep it alive
🎶 So what’s the glory in Liking?
Doesn’t anybody ever stay on Facebook anymore?
And if Likes never last forever
Tell me what’s a Meta for?
—Rafe Van Hoy / Black Cloud
The original “What’s Forever For?” is a sincere lament about love losing its permanence. Its resemblance to “What’s a Metaphor?” was an invitation Black Cloud could hardly refuse. Our parody is not at the song’s expense; it simply transfers its melancholy to a world where affection is measured in Likes. The original song, quite innocently, volunteered for duty. Mark Zuckerberg had nothing to do with it, but we gave him the lead vocal anyway.
More from the poetry and lyric column: HERE
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