THE PERENNIAL SOPHOMORE PRESENTS: The History of Democracy — Picture Card Series

( Our seated figure is the Hamangia “Thinker,” a Neolithic statuette discovered at Cernavodă in present-day Romania and dating to roughly the fifth millennium B.C.—evidence that mankind has been doing some of its best thinking while seated in quiet contemplation for at least seven thousand years.)

There are certain subjects a mature publication approaches with reverence, restraint, and a proper appreciation for the settled wisdom of the ages.

Fortunately, The Perennial Sophomore is under no such obligation.

The brother publication of the Council-of-Concerned-Conservationists has therefore undertaken a new educational project: The History of Democracy Picture Card Series, issued in convenient packs of five, accompanied—as civilization apparently requires—by one flat stick of bubble gum.

Democracy is ordinarily viewed through rose-colored glasses. The Perennial Sophomore has substituted the peculiar blue-violet spectacles of an old mimeograph machine—that unmistakable purple ink familiar to anyone who once received a freshly duplicated school handout. Not necessarily because they make the subject look better, but because occasionally they make it look different enough to look at again.

The cards that follow are not an argument against democracy. Quite the contrary. They proceed from the uncomfortable suspicion that an institution worth preserving ought to survive being looked at without its makeup on.

Kings, voters, philosophers, demagogues, hanging chads, constitutions, mobs, majorities, minorities, and members of the Council will consequently appear as circumstances require.

Some cards will make democracy look ridiculous. Some may make its alternatives look considerably worse.

Five cards to a pack, with one flat stick of bubble gum—something to chew on while you chew over the contents. No guarantees against cavities, dental or democratic. Both have a way of leaving a void.

Editorial selection, historical judgment, questionable emphasis, and any resulting correspondence are the responsibility of me, Thaddeus “Tad” Zimas, Editor, The Perennial Sophomore.

The Council assumes no editorial responsibility whatsoever.

PACK No. 1
We begin where any respectable card collector begins: by opening the pack and seeing what we got. Five cards, randomly selected and presented in the order they emerged. We make no promises about chronology, subject matter, historical importance—or duplicates. That’s the trouble with history. You never quite know what you’re going to get, and occasionally you get it twice—good and hard. Much like the gum.